Lists

So this is my random ranting of the day, mostly as i had realized i haven't written a blog in forever and also as i have some good thought-purging to partake in.

Things which i secretly enjoy:

1. The flick of a zippo lighter

2. Getting into my seat on the airplane and seeing that the person who sat there before was much larger and getting to pull the seatbelt all the way in

3. Flirting with the geeks at BestBuy. Ahhh, dirty computer talk really fills out a Sunday, am I right?

4. Watching people having to pick up their dog's poop. The ultimate society equalizer.

5. New and bizarre food

6. The first cigarette of the day, when it's still cold out and the fog is just rising over the hills as I exhale (yes, i began again. fuck nicotine and good times)

Things which I don't really understand:

1. "Baby on Board" signs. Am I supposed to suddenly become a super conservative and safe driver in your presence because you have a child with you? Don't think so.

2. People who respond to craigslist ads with something that is completely irrelevant. Ex: I'm selling a sofa and someone writes asking what the name of the paint color in the background of the photo is... nice.

3. People who feel the need to direct traffic. We get it. Go around you. We don't need you waving your arm in repetitive circles to tell us this.

4. Capri cigarettes. Why??? The thing is so damn tiny I feel as if I have to pull with every whisper of breath in my body to get a decent drag.

5. Men

6. Easy mac. Unless you a child, if you are really that lazy, just go over to the deli and buy some pre-made mac and cheese. No tiny pouches of easy cheese required.

7. Why no matter how many times I use the same hair color, it always comes out completely different... although I suppose consistency is overrated. And my grandmother freaking out and screaming "YOUR HAIR IS BLACK!!! Are you gothic now???" is quite funny.

8. Having to "watch my language" around children. How am I supposed to tell you the name of the new Quentin Tarantino movie I want to see if I can't say 'Bastard' in the presence of toddlers. Let's stop pretending the world is a magical happy place in which people don't swear... or poop.

So thats the end of my griping, thinking and listing for the day.